Clients are the experts on their lives

Clients are the experts on their lives. Each client I work with brings a unique perspective, portfolio of strengths and experiences and smart habits. There are also fears and concerns about changing that are also unique to each client. That’s why it’s so important for me to walk alongside my clients and remind them that while we can co-create plans to help them reach their goals, they’re the boss of their health and life and I’ll do anything I can to support their self-directed success.

As a trained health and lifestyle wellness specialist, I often have ideas about what may be helpful for a client, but depending on their readiness and willingness to change, my perspectives may or may not be right or timely. Without a doubt, my training or expertise in an area is only information. The client is bio-individual and knows herself more intimately than I ever could, so my professional perspective is only purposeful with permission in our partnership as we work to help her design plans for successful health and lifestyle wellness changes.

Change is hard and for a client to be self-directed, it’s never about what I think, it is always about what my client thinks. This may sound wrong to some since clients come to me for support and oftentimes advice, but my role is to partner with them using evidence-based techniques, trained listening, and evocation to elicit what they know about themselves. Everyone has an inner knowing of themselves – gut feelings and judgment of what is right – and the nirvana comes when that inner knowing intersects with a client’s readiness to change and pursue her plan, smart goals, and lifelong new habits with unapologetic and non-negotiable commitment.

Since I was in my 20s, I have read a lot of self-help and success books, because there is nothing I’m probably more passionate about than someone being fully in their potential. My enthusiasm is ablaze for people when they find their edge and are living in it purposefully for the greater good. It just rocks my soul. It’s pure joy.

One thing I’ve learned: No one-size fits all formula works. Ever. Individually, we are the experts on our own lives and no two clients are ever the same, so putting a formula into a coaching practice can be disastrous. Ebbing and flowing with clients is much like the tides of the sea. Some days it’s high tide and the waves, peaks, and activity is energetic and productive. Other times it’s a calm low tide of introspection, getting unstuck and taking a step back.

Long-term, clients are best served when we let them be where they are and usher them along in a way that is co-created and self-directed by the client. Our role is only occasionally justified to give clients a healthy nudge or occasional grace-filled push, and 99% of the time, because we were given permission.